Waiting

     It is almost 6:30 am here in Germany. At about 8am I am going to be picking up my amazing husband from the platoon office, where he is being brought as I type this right now! I am so excited. I have so many feelings rushing through my mind and body right now, I don't know how to control them, and I don't know which one to feel at this moment!

EXCITED!: I am excited for obvious reasons. The biggest reason is, though, that my daughter will no longer have to talk to a picture, or walk around the house looking for her Daddy, and me with no way to help her understand that Daddy is away shooting the bad guys, so that we can be safe.

ANXIOUS: I had a heck of a time sleeping last night! It took me forever to fall asleep, and staying asleep was a struggle! I have been awake since 5am! I just can't relax because the anxiety of having my husband home is sitting in. I mean anxiety in a good way! I don't have to do it all anymore, I can get help, and I never truly understood how much I appreciate the help when I do get it, because it isn't easy being a "single" but not single parent to a 15 month old Daddy's girl!

BLESSED: I am blessed to be able to having my wonderful husband home, though the rest of our friends, that became family, are still fighting, and for that I am thankful for! I feel bad to have taken my husband away from his "other family" and he feels bad too, and if it wasn't for my horrible back and body problems, I would still be counting the days until he comes home, in April! But missions change, and I know that is something our military friends can understand. I am the most hated wife right now, but I would give almost anything to be 1/2 as healthy as they are.

NERVOUS: I am so nervous! We have been living without each other for 9 months now, and even before the deployment, he was gone most days and nights, so it really has been like this for 15 months now! I have a schedule and a way I do things, and I know my husband will try his best to keep our schedule, he is going to come in and change things, for the better, but it will be an adjustment for all of us! A much needed adjustment though!

     As I write this, I think about our fellow comrades that are still fighting today, and I miss you guys too. You have become Makenna's demented Uncles, and I wouldn't change that for the world! Keep your head up, and you will be returning to your family in a blink of an eye! I love you guys!